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Let Me Introduce You to My Daughter Harper

Harper Ferguson, Iamharper #iamharper Harperstoybox
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So, a few years ago, I took a pause on this journey of blogging just before the introduction of my third child.  I was knee deep in being a boy mom when at the ripe age of 38, I found out I was expecting another bumbling bundle of joy.  I was kind of in denial about being pregnant again and prolonged the affirmation of the wondrous news for a few weeks (okay months) longer than I normally would. 

she is also my last baby, loudest cheerleader, girl power super hero and sweetest night cuddler

Harper Ferguson, Iamharper #iamharper Harperstoybox babybump 3ammom

To be honest, I finally fessed up around my 5th month of pregnancy, with a Facebook post out of guilt and to quell any complaints from people I may have forgotten to tell.  At that point, the easiest way to let the cat out of the bag was with a blatant belly pic!  Boom!  There you go, baby number 3 is on the way and all things we had planned must be reevaluated.

I tell you this because my third child is a force to be reckoned with and I am, in all honesty, terrified of the future battles she and I will endure.  She is my closest ally and fiercest foe and has made it her lifelong cree to disagree with every, single, thing that I say.  Seriously. Everything. But she is also my last baby, loudest cheerleader, girl power super hero and sweetest night cuddler, which is swiftly followed by nonstop front kicks to my back…….but I digress.

Harper Ferguson, Iamharper #iamharper Harperstoybox 3ammom

She managed to trick us the first two years of her life because she could not effectively communicate with words.   Not the way she wanted to, with rebuttals, and sidebars, and objections. She was restricted to one-word replys and she didn’t have many words to choose from. She sat quietly in her carrier, while being courted around to multiple soccer games, playdates and birthday parties of her two big brothers.  She would sit in that carrier with a pacifier or a bottle and watch the world go by.  The perfect little baby with her cute bows and beautifully curious eyes. Yes, I was fooled just like everyone else and didn’t take the hints that were dropped to show who this little girl really was until she could walk and talk on her own. 

Harper Ferguson, Iamharper #iamharper Harperstoybox
Once she was freed from the confines of our baby-carrying devices, it was on! That was the end of me being able to watch a full soccer game of one of her brothers and the end of me having a full conversation with another parent, forever. That small baby who quietly sat in the stroller became a confident little girl who demanded we take notice. She was ready to unleash this strong persona that is outgoing and shy, sassy and sweet, hard-headed and helpful, spirited and witty and probably most importantly LOYAL. She will beat the heck out of her big brother and then give him her last treat. She will battle me to tears about doing her math work or brushing her teeth. She will verbalize every and any excuse, while polishing up her future Prosecutor skills, in efforts to not do what I ask of her. We will both leave these battles exhausted and heated. However, she is able to let those feelings go if she ever sees distress or pain on my face or in my words and will switch to a nurturing role immediately.
I love that she is so sassy and confident. I love that she is a strong leader and good friend. I struggle daily with how I should intervene and advise.
Harper Ferguson, Iamharper #iamharper Harperstoybox
In today’s world you need to be a strong woman and be ready to fight a little harder for the same notoriety. I don’t ever want my words to weaken that confidence and strong will I see in her daily. It’s such a difficult balance when trying to build strong, empathetic, competitive and nurturing young girls who won’t fall victim to only rating their success by physical appearance. It is much easier said than done. So, I try hard to balance the lectures of inappropriate behavior with strong praise of her personality traits when used constructively. When reviewing her writing, I follow my phrase of “that isn’t a complete sentence and you are using too much slang” with “that story is so witty, what an interesting viewpoint, that character is cringe and you are an amazing writer”. I don’t always get it right, but I am hoping to get it right enough, so that the future “sass” stays strong, but is balanced with intelligent and heartfelt actions.

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